Monday, September 5, 2016

If Only I Believed in Hell


This morning I read “Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God” to get a Puritan perspective, and thought how horrific it must have been for them to live in such fear and dread of making the slightest misstep. Then, this afternoon, I had the opportunity to think that if “the devil is waiting for them, hell is gaping for them, the flames gather and flash about them” (Baym 213) that this could be a wonderful thing for some people.

My daughter received a phone call with a girl screaming that a man had grabbed her. Then the man got on the phone and said he had her daughter and if she wanted her back that she had to take all of her money out of her account and wire it to an account to Mexico. She signaled her fiancé, who unsuccessfully attempted to call the friend where her daughter was visiting and then called the police. She drove to the ATM, took out the cash, still talking to the “kidnapper,” and then drove like a bat out of hell to the friend’s house. When she saw her daughter, she just tossed her cellphone to the police. This scam is not uncommon and is known as virtual kidnapping. The local police turned the information over to the FBI, and they will be contacting her.

Tonight, I wish I believed in hell. It would be easier if I knew that this amoral, heartless son-of-a-bitch was going to burn forever for what he put all of us through. Did he ever stop and put himself in the parents’ position? Is he completely psychotic? Does he rationalize his actions by thinking this is okay because no one is physically hurt and that it is just a scam? It didn’t feel scam-like. It felt soul-crushing. Is this why the concept of hell was developed? It almost sounds like telling your children, “You don’t have to worry about that bad man, honey, the bogey man will get him when he least expects it.” Perhaps it is to allow good people to continue functioning without mentally getting lost in the need for some form of retribution.

When my ex-husband was in college, he and three roommates rented a house and promptly let all the grass and trees die. Years later, we rented out our house, paid the water bill and had all of the grass on a sprinkler system. The renters, as you now expect, turned off the sprinkler system and killed everything. They were also making meth. The house and the garage were so covered in the by-product of this endeavor that the sheriff’s department declared it would require a $250,000 hazardous materials clean-up. I remember lying in bed late at night, neither of us sleeping, and my husband saying, “This is my fault. This is my karma, and the law of ten-fold return for killing everything at that rental house when I was in college.” This is what happens when a Catholic gives up Catholicism but still accepts all of the guilt. Honestly, that isn’t very fair since guilt is a great motivator for me as well.

My dad and I had a challenging relationship. He was in World War II and saw horrific action, but came home physically whole with the exception of acquiring jungle rot on his feet that hurt and itched every day. Like many of his generation, he came home looking for the promised brightest of futures. For several years, it appeared as of he found it. Then things started going badly. My oldest sister became very ill, requiring 42 blood transfusions and running such a high fever that she died a few times before coming back to life. My other sister was badly burned in an accident, requiring being salt water floatation until they could do skin grafts. After that, my mom had a series of miscarriages. Dad’s parents died. His favorite brother had a heart attack, and when my dad got to the hospital, there was no sign of him. He searched that hospital until he found his brother, dead and stuffed into a janitor’s closet. He had died in transit, and the small emergency room had been overwhelmed, so they just put him out of the way.

Finally, I was one of three baby girls born in that same hospital on a hot, summer day. All three of us sickened with hours, unable to digest anything. The first died within a few weeks. The second lived until she was 19, never able to process the necessary nutrients from food to the point where she was wheelchair-bound, mentally and physically handicapped. Me? My mom took me to Children’s Hospital immediately. She’d been there enough and knew a sick kid when she saw one. For two and half years, they did tests and surgery, and wanted to start more when she stopped the treatment and took me home. She had studied herbs and vitamins in the interim, and had come up with her own treatment plan. By this point, our house was overrun with kids including his own children, nieces and nephews, and one of the abandoned neighbor kids. My dad took a stand. About me. “Let this one go,” he told my mom. “We have saved all the others. Let this one go.” My mom didn’t agree. She began using an eye-dropper to give me goat’s milk mixed with herbs while dad started using a coffee cup to measure his whiskey.

Dad was a handsome, brilliant, charismatic man – outside of the house. He was a successful business owner, working six days a week, he served on the local school board for nineteen years, and was important in the B.P.O. Elks, Lodge 1625 (odd how I remember that) and the American Legion. For the time period, he was progressive, hiring workers who were smart and hard-working, completely discounting their race, color, and histories. His employees were devoted and adored him for this. One of his brothers was deaf, so dad signed fluently. Customers would come from other states just to do business with him. He was a great father to my sisters for most of their childhoods. I saw occasional signs of all of this, but I never knew that man. For most of my childhood, he was the alcoholic I avoided. I was seven or eight when I discovered the true purpose of slats on the underside of the bedframe: they were there so kids like me could crawl under the bed and then pull themselves up to the bottom of the slats to hide.

So, while this was rather convoluted, it does touch on guilt. When dad was dying, I drove him for radiation treatments five days a week. His feet hurt. I bought him three pairs of slipper-shoes, trying to make him more comfortable. This upset my mom. “What are you doing? Nothing is going to help.” I explained to her that I had set a three-pair limit because I didn’t want to wake up in ten years and ask myself if I couldn’t have bought my dying father a comfortable pair of shoes. Three pairs. That, in my mind, was the magic number. She shook her head, but I knew I just didn’t want to have that guilt hanging over me.

Today, I don’t want to hear that the scam artist had a rough childhood, was deprived of a positive father-figure in his life or the succor of religion. Not today. Today, I just want the FBI to find this asshole and remove him from society. Period. I know it isn’t likely that they will find him. I also know not to expect justice. I was intimately involved in a court case when I was young, and learned that there is no justice, only a mass of often-conflicting laws. I think of Justinian I, the Eastern Roman Emperor, who took all of the Roman laws and directed that they be sorted and rewritten in a logical manner in 529 CE. Can we do this again? It isn’t as if all the law books would have to be re-printed. We could just publish them electronically. It took them four years with ink and parchment, so I’ll give them eight years with computers and internet (and yes, there is a logic there). Of course, this would lessen the need for nearly as many lawyers, so they would never let this happen. I was on a senatorial community panel for the Affordable Care Act. I asked why we couldn’t just have nationalized health care, and the response was that the lawyers absolutely would not permit it. Okay, now that I’ve written this many words, I acknowledge that the best I can hope for is that my daughter and her family puts this behind them in a healthy manner, and that I can educate enough people about this scam that it becomes an ineffective tactic. I’m just going to conclude with my favorite quote, attributed to Flannery O’Connor: “I write because I don't know what I think until I read what I say.”
 
Work Cited
Baym, Nina, ed. The Norton Anthology of American Literature. 8th ed. New York: W.W. Norton, 2013. Print.

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